


where i follow, you'll go

by waywardprentiss



Category: The West Wing
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Episode: s02e01 In the Shadow of Two Gunmen: Part 1, Episode: s02e02 In the Shadow of Two Gunmen: Part 2, Friends to Lovers, Hurt/Comfort, Love Confessions, M/M, Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-18
Updated: 2020-10-18
Packaged: 2021-03-09 05:15:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,374
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27069244
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/waywardprentiss/pseuds/waywardprentiss
Summary: An agonizing wave of panic and grief washes over Sam as he realizes that this may be the one place Josh goes where he can't follow.
Relationships: Donna Moss & Sam Seaborn, Josh Lyman & Donna Moss, Josh Lyman/Sam Seaborn
Comments: 9
Kudos: 69





	where i follow, you'll go

**Author's Note:**

> i started writing this because i wanted to expand on how and why sam says "josh, i'm here!" but then it kinda got away from me

"I need a doctor!"

Sam whips his head around at the sound of Toby's voice. 

He's halfway to him with CJ following behind before Sam realizes the person he has clutched in his arms is Josh.

Fear stops Sam right in his tracks. All he can do is stare as his body goes numb.

He's jolted out of his shock by a paramedic bumping into his shoulder as she makes her way over to Toby and Josh.

His feet start moving of their own accord and he ends up making it to Toby and Josh before she or CJ does.

Sam's hands immediately find the wound on Josh's side and cover his slack hands to apply more pressure.

CJ bends down to help him and Sam looks up at Josh's pale face. He sees his eyes glaze over and a whine gets stuck in the back of his throat.

"Sirs." The paramedic says before two more appear behind her out of nowhere. "Ma'am, you all need to step back and let us do our jobs."

The two other paramedics with her start to pull Josh out of their grip and Sam makes a noise of protest.

CJ steps back but he doesn't move.

"Sam." Toby says, his voice rough. "You have to let go."

Toby lays a hand on his chest to push him back and Sam can feel the blood on Toby's hand sweep through his shirt.

Sam nods silently and he drops his hand.

They both stand up and back away a few feet to where CJ is standing with a hand over his mouth.

The three of them watch numbly as Josh gets loaded up onto a gurney and rushed into a nearby ambulance.

-

They don't let any of them ride with Josh.

A secret service agent agrees to take the three of them to the hospital and he gets into the car on shaky legs.

An agonizing wave of panic and grief washes over Sam as he realizes that this may be the one place Josh goes where he can't follow.

-

They pull up at the hospital just behind the ambulance and Sam sees the back open up.

He rushes to get out of the car but gets lost on the way to the door in the chaos of nurses and doctors and first responders that are huddled around the entrance. 

He catches up in the hall just in time to hear Toby's voice. "We don't know. He was behind us."

He yells when he catches site of the gurnay going through a set of doors. "Josh, I'm here!"

Sam shoulders his way through the crowd of bodies and passes a shaken looking CJ.

"I shouldn't be at this meeting. Senator...." Josh mumbles, eyes darting around.

"Tell me what's happening!" Sam hears Leo ask one of the doctors. 

Her voice is urgent. "I don't have time!"

"I shouldn't be at this meeting." Josh mumbles again, trying to sit up as the gurnay comes to a stop. "I need to get to New Hampshire."

Sam makes his way to Josh's side and grabs one of his flailing hands. He leans forward trying to catch Josh's eye.

"You went to New Hampshire. We both did. You came and got me." 

Sam tries to reassure him but Josh doesn't seem to hear him before his eyes start rolling in the back of his head.

Sam squeezes his arm. "Josh!" 

The nurse on his left turns her attention briefly to him. "Sir, I need you to step back."

He's pushed to the side by her and three others as they move Josh from the gurney to a bed. "On my count. One, two, three!"

From where he's braced against the wall, he hears the nurse speak to Josh. "Josh, a bullet collapsed your lung. We're putting in a tube to re-expand it."

After they've wheeled Josh through a set of doors that are marked for staff only, Sam finds himself drifting toward the reception desk.

Josh had said New Hampshire and suddenly he was transported back in time.

-

He's in New York at Gage-Whitney. He'd been in a meeting with an oil company for over an hour thinking, "Is this really all there is?"

Then, he's walking into his office and Josh is there. Josh's arms are around his shoulders, his face is in Josh's neck. The words, "You look fit." come out before he can stop them. 

Sam remembers asking if he wanted to grab a hotdog together. He remembers the smile on Josh's face even as he shakes his head and reminds Sam that it was only nine o'clock in the morning. Sam remembers ushering him out of the room with a grin.

Suddenly, they're out on the street after brunch and Sam's throwing away his napkin while Josh tells him he was gonna call but had forgotten the name of his firm.

He remembers Josh trying for the tenth time to get him to work for Hoynes. He remembers using his engagement to Lisa as an excuse not to go.

When all Josh said was okay, Sam felt an opportunity slip by.

He always felt that eventually they'd stop dancing around this thing that they had between them. The entire conversations they'd have with just a look. The way he'd always been closer to Josh than to anyone he had ever known.

What Josh didn't know then was that Sam was scared. Scared to leave the bubble he'd found himself stuck in, scared that it would be all he'd ever know and scared that he'd just felt their last chance for something more slip through his fingers.

When Josh started rambling about how he had to get to Nashua, Sam couldn't help but tell him how much he missed him.

He wouldn't admit it out loud to anyone but his heart broke a little when all Josh did was pat his shoulder as he went to leave.

Something made Sam stop him though and ask if Hoynes was the real deal. A flicker of hope in the pit of his stomach that said maybe there was something greater out there.

When Josh asked if he should call him if he saw the real thing in Nashua, he couldn't help but make a joke about how horrible the other man's poker face was.

The smile that Josh gave him was worth any pain Sam had felt. 

He couldn't help but watch Josh as he walked away. An array of mixed emotions went through his head but something way down deep in his gut told him everything was gonna be okay.

Sam shook his head, grinning at the way Josh always made him feel better despite everything.

Turning around, he runs straight into someone and suddenly he's back in the hospital.

He gasps. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I was just-"

The woman in front of him is grabbing his arms and leading him to a nearby chair but Sam doesn't hear a word she says.

His mind is still on a cloudy New York morning, standing in the middle of a sidewalk with a curly haired boy who's smile has always made his knees go weak.

-

After a minute, Sam gets up and makes his way around the corner and finds everyone waiting in a private room the hospital has set up for them.

He's standing in the back with Toby and Charlie while CJ is talking quietly with Zoey by the door when Dr. Bartlet comes in. She tells them the President is gonna be fine and everyone exhales sighs of relief. 

Then, she starts talking about Josh.

All Sam hears are the words "repair" and "pulmonary artery" and he stumbles back into a chair just like he did moments before.

He's bent over his knees with a hand over his eyes when he feels a hand land on his shoulder.

Sam looks up and sees Toby. The other man gives him a sad look and silently squeezes his shoulder in support.

All they can do is wait.

-

After a little while, Dr. Bartlet and Zoey leave to check on the President.

To distract himself, Sam starts writing up a draft for CJ. He couldn't tell you how long he was writing for when the door opened.

"Um... excuse me." It's the hospital administrator. "We can't make you very comfortable here and Josh's procedure is likely to take twelve to fourteen hours, so-"

He's cut off by the other door to the room opening up. Sam jerks his head around and sees CJ and Toby do the same. It's Donna.

"I'm sorry. They told me I should come back here. I'm sorry." She says, sheepishly. 

She sits down her bag in the chair behind Sam and meets his eye. 

He's struck speechless for a moment. He can't believe he didn't call her. He glances away and then beside him at CJ and sees the same shame in her eyes.

Donna looks back and forth between them. "Is there word on the President?"

"The President's going to be fine." CJ answers softly.

Donna exhales in relief. "Oh, thank God."

Sam sees her bring her hand up and laugh into her palm and he thinks he's gonna be sick.

"Oh, thank God." She repeats. "That's the best news I've ever heard."

From where he's leaning over the armrest of his chair with a hand against his cheek, he casts his eyes to the floor as she rambles.

"I got here as fast as I could. I had a hard time getting in. I had to, had to find an agent who knew me. And I was shaking... I didn't know."

He makes eye contact with CJ again. Seeing that she doesn't have the heart to tell her either, he glances over and meets Toby's eye.

Toby sighs. "Donna." 

She jerks her head his way and in that moment Sam realizes she was expecting him to speak instead and he feels his heart break all over again.

"Josh was hit."

Sam can't bring himself to look up from his notebook. 

Donna is silent for a moment before huffing out a laugh. "Hit with what?"

He flinches slightly as Toby elaborates. "He was shot- in the chest."

"He's in surgery right now." CJ says quietly and Sam shifts his hand to cover his mouth as he feels the urge to be sick again.

"I don't understand."

"I don't understand." She repeats and he can hear the panic bleed into her voice. "Is it serious?"

Toby looks down at the small spiral notebook in his hands before answering. "Yes, it's critical. The bullet collapsed his lung and damaged a major artery."

Donna gasps quietly, covering her mouth with her hand.

The administrator speaks after a moment of silence. "I was just saying, we can't make you very comfortable here and the procedure is likely to take twelve to fourteen hours."

Sam looks up finally as he continues. "We won't know anything untill morning. I'm sure there are things you're supposed to be attending to right now."

He meets Sam's eye. "If you like, we can stay in touch with you at your homes and offices throughout the night."

With that, he turns away and walks out the room closing the door behind him. 

Sam looks down at his notebook again, eyes flickering over the statement he's written. He feels Donna settle into the seat beside Charlie behind him and rips out the piece of paper before handing it to CJ.

She takes it with her left while her right arm is stretched out behind their chairs toward Donna. "Leo is going to meet with the leadership in ten minutes."

Sam moves to place his arm beside hers on the back of their chairs as she continues, "When he's done, I'll talk to the press."

Charlie pickes his coat up from where it was drapped over the back of his chair. "I'm going to go back to the residence and pick up some things for the President."

He leaves out one exit and CJ the other. 

Sam looks down at the arm he has propped against the back of his chair before reaching a hand out and touching Donna's shoulder.

She gasps out a sob and covers his hand with hers. He squeezes hers tight and moves his jacket and notebook from his lap to the coffee table in front of him without dislodging their hands.

Sam squeezes hers again before letting go and getting up to go around to sit next to her where Charlie was previously.

"Hey," he says, quietly. He puts his arm over the back of her chair. "Come here."

She looks up at him with tears in her eyes that are threatening to spill over before leaning against him softly. 

His arm moves to wrap around her shoulder and he feels tears hit his neck.

"He's gonna be alright, isn't he?" Her voice is thick with tears. "I mean, it's Josh."

Sam laughs despite the tears in his own eyes. "I hope so. God, I hope so."

"Sam." She starts crying louder. "God, Sam. What if he-"

"No." He cuts her off, a sharp pain in his chest appearing. "No, don't- don't say it."

She clutches his shirt as she stutters, "I don't know what I'd do- I. He's one of my best friends. What-"

He squeezes her closer while a few more tears slip down his cheeks.

"God, Sam. What am I even saying? I'm so stupid. You're actually his best friend. You two have known each other for so long."

He gasps out a sob, the pain in his chest returning tenfold.

She starts rubbing his chest in the same spot where she was clutching moments earlier. "I'm sorry."

"It's alright." He says after moment, his voice cracking. "You mean a lot to him, too."

He smiles wetly down at her. "And to me."

She sits back a little and looks up at him. "I love you, too, Sam."

He tilts his head down bashfully and she laughs wetly at him.

"Everything will be okay." A determind look crosses her face. "It has to be."

"Yeah." He says quietly. 

The situation hits him again and he rubs his temple, feeling a headache coming on.

Donna silently moves closer to him again and pulls him into a hug. 

Shs starts rubbing his back and Sam feels tears roll down his face once more. "I love him, Donna."

His voice breaks and he buries his head into her shoulder. 

She squeezes him tight. "I know."

He pulls back enough to whisper against her coat. "I mean-"

"I know." She cuts him off. "It's okay. I know."

The grip on his shoulders tighten again and they stay like that for a while. Honestly, Sam couldn't tell you how long.

-

After what could be a hour or ten minutes, Sam leaves for The White House with Toby.

He tries to get some work done but he ends up staring into space in the darkness of his office more often than not.

When Toby comes by and asks if he wants to go back to the hospital, he follows quietly.

-

The moment they get back to the room, Sam makes his way to Donna. 

Her eyes are red but she smiles up at him and he sits next to her without a word.

At one point, someone asks if either of them want coffee but they both shake their heads.

Her steadfast and silent support makes him feel better than caffeine ever could.

When Donna is flipping through a magazine, Sam turns toward Dr. Bartlet. "Ma'am, does the President know they've arrested a suspect?"

She nods. "Yes. I told him. He's pretty groggy after the anesthesia."

They share a small smile before an aide pokes his head in through the door. "Sam. Toby. You've got a phone call in the other room."

Sam turns toward Donna. She nods in acknowledgment so he gets up and follows Toby into a room across the hall.

He agrees when CJ asks him to come back to The White House to speak to Nancy McNally about a letter the President was supposed to sign and his headache comes back with a vengeance when Toby mentions the press wanting to know why the President exited the building in open air.

Toby says he'll take care of it even after Sam's half hearted attempts to take it off his plate.

"Go back to the office."

Sam sighs. "Okay. Okay."

He makes his way back out into the hall and for some reason his mind goes back to Gage-Whitney again, three years prior. 

He remembers telling thier client to buy different and better ships. He remembers going on and on until his boss stopped him and pulled him aside. 

Sam didn't know what to say when his boss asked if he was trying to get himself fired. He didn't even realize his boss was right until he saw Josh standing on the other side of the conference room door soaking wet.

Josh stood there pointing to his face and grinning like an idiot and Sam couldn't look away.

"It doesn't quite feel like I have your attention." Their client commented from across the table.

Sam remembers mouthing, "Yeah?" And Josh's answering nod making him grin so hard his cheeks hurt.

He remembers laughing at the client's phrasing, thinking truer words had never been spoken.

He gets up from the table ignoring everyone's shouts and smiles at Josh when he opens the door. 

His boss' voice echoes. "Where are you going?"

"New Hampshire!" Sam had yelled back over his shoulder.

Sam thinks fondly as he comes back to the present that Josh didn't even have to say a word and he would follow him anywhere.

-

He bumps into CJ around four in the morning and brings her up to date on his conversation with Nancy. He manages to brush off her comments about who could've pulled her down.

Sam's not sure if he's ready to have that conversation just yet.

He agrees to do the morning shows for her half for the distraction itself. 

-

It's around nine in the morning when Donna calls and tells him Josh has been taken off bypass. 

He's packing his things to head over there when CJ appears in his office door and beckons him for a walk.

Her comment about her reason for not doing the morning shows being that it didn't feel right with Josh being in surgery rubs him the wrong way. He thinks he was more distraught about that than she was and he's the one who ended up having to do them but there was nothing he could do about it now. It was already done.

Sam really should've known she'd figure out what happened. And that she wouldn't feel beholden to him.

After Sam gives her back her necklace, she asks him if he was scared. "Yeah."

"Me too."

They share a soft smile and Sam tells her he'll see her at the hospital later.

-

When Sam arrives at the hospital, Donna is waiting for him.

"How is he?" He asks, slightly out of breath.

She smiles. "He's stable."

"Thank God." He grabs her up in a hug.

She squeezes him tight before pulling back. "They're getting a room set up for him but Leo and the President went in there just a minute ago to see him."

He gapes. "He's awake?"

"I don't know." Donna shakes her head. "In and out, I think. They'll let us see him once they get him settled. I asked." 

"Okay."

They sit down to wait and about a hour later, CJ and Toby arrive and settle in to wait with them.

Leo walks in the door not ten minutes after they arrive.

He smiles at them. "First thing he said was, 'What's next?'"

They all laugh and Sam feels a huge weight lift off his chest.

"And how's the President?" CJ asks.

"Good." Leo nods. "He's gone back to his room to rest. I just came in to say that you can go in and see Josh now."

Toby waves a hand toward him and Donna. "You two go first, we'll catch him later. But tell him if he ever does something like this again, I'll kill him myself."

Sam huffs out a laugh and shakes his head but CJ slaps Toby's shoulder. "Toby!"

Donna rolls her eyes at them and turns toward Sam. She touches his arm. "Ready?"

Grinning, he says, "Yeah. Let's go."

-

Donna walks in first. She holds the door open and looks over her shoulder back at him to make sure he catches it. 

Sam gently closes it behind them all the while his eyes never leaving Josh's sleeping face.

They've put him in a nice room with a big window and a TV in the corner. Sam laughs to himself as he imagines the other man stuck in bed here screaming at the news for the next several weeks.

Donna walks around to the other side of the bed with a hand over her mouth, tears rolling down her face again. 

Sam had pictured him with tubes down his throat and wires everywhere, totally unrecognizable but he still looks like Josh. 

All he has is one of those thin oxygen tubes hooked in his nose. He's pale but he looks just like he always does when he's sleeping.

Donna has pulled one of the chairs by the window closer to his bedside and has settled into it as Sam walks around to grab the other. 

He pulls it around to the other side so both of them can hold one of his hands.

Sam settles in and sees Donna take his right hand. He leans forward, running his own hand soflty down Josh's left arm over the wires and tape to squeeze his hand.

"Josh." He whispers.

Josh's eyes flutter open. He blinks slowly a few times, his face groggy. He turns his head toward Sam and Sam's face splits into a wide smile even as he feels his eyes tear up again.

"Hey." Sam whispers again. "How are you feeling?"

Josh blinks slowly again. He opens his mouth to speak but nothing comes out. He squints in confusion and tries to clear his throat. 

His attention is drawn by Donna who Sam can see squeezes his hand. "Do you want some water?"

Josh turns to look at her and nods.

She smiles the same teary eyed smile at him that Sam did. She gets up and heads to the tray that's on the opposite wall. Donna picks up the big tumbler full of water there and fills the cup up next to it.

Sam is relieved to see that Josh looks a bit more awake and aware of what's going on by the time she walks back over with the cup in her hands. 

Donna leans forward, bending the straw before bringing it up to Josh's lips. 

He takes a couple of swallows and nods his head when he's done. Donna smiles before putting the cup away and sitting back down again.

Josh clears his throat and slowly, a smirk appears on his face. "So, what are you too looking so sad for? Did someone get shot or something?"

Even with his voice quiet and rough, he sounds just like his usual self and Sam grins.

Donna doesn't find it as funny. 

"Josh!" She exclaims. "This is serious. Don't you ever do anything like that ever again."

Josh laughs. "It wasn't my fault!"

"You're right and you're also one of my best friends so don't even joke about this."

"Alright." His voice goes serious and Sam squeezes his hand again.

"God." Donna chokes out a sound that's half laugh, half sob. She releases his hand to shove his arm a bit. "I hate you. Never do that to me again."

"God, Donna." Josh winces. "Okay."

She bolts up in her seat. "Are you okay? Oh my God. I'm sorry. I can't believe I just did that. You just got shot!"

"Donna." Josh stops her rambling. "I'm okay. Come here."

Sam smiles at them and feels Josh squeeze his hand before he's letting go and beckoning Donna to come closer for a hug.

She's careful where her hands land on him but he pulls her close anyway and cups the back of her head.

"I'm okay." Sam hears him whisper against the side of Donna's neck. "It's gonna be alright."

Sam hears her crying as he moves his hand to rest on Josh's leg. Tears gather in his eyes but he smiles down at Josh's leg, grateful that two of his favorite people in the world are safe right here in front of him.

She pulls back after a minute and Josh cups her face. "I'm alright."

She smiles before settling back in her chair and wiping her eyes.

Josh grabs the hand Sam still has on his leg and gives it a squeeze before turning his attention toward him. "Hey, stranger."

Sam smiles and asks him again, "How are you feeling?"

Josh sighs, smiling lazily at him. "Tired."

"The doctors told you how everything went?"

He nods, eyes slipping closed. "The President brought me up to speed."

Sam shares a look with Donna.

"Go back to sleep, Josh." He says, softly. "We can come back later." 

"No." His eyes blink open again. "Stay. I wanted to talk to you."

Sam leans forward, lowering his voice. "I'll be here when you wake up. Just go back to sleep."

Josh's eyes are already slipping closed again as he whispers, "Okay."

-

After a while of talking quietly so they don't disturb Josh, Donna looks at her watch. "I've been here all night. I think I'm going to go home for a while. Clean up and try to get some sleep."

Sam unconsciously squeezes Josh's hand.

Josh fell asleep with his hand still stuck in Sam's, curled up in his lap and Sam had neither the heart or the want to move them.

He opens his mouth to protest as she gets up and collects her things. She comes around behind him and stops him with a hand on his shoulder. "It's okay. He wanted to talk to you, Sam. Not me."

He feels his face heat and she chuckles quietly at him. "I'll update everyone and come back tomorrow, okay?"

He nods and reaches up to squeeze the hand she still has on his shoulder.

She squeezes back. "Take care of him. Keep me updated."

"I will." He whispers.

With one last look at Josh, Donna makes her way to the door. Sam watches it close behind her before turning back to Josh.

He rubs Josh's knuckles and leans his elbow against the armrest of his chair. He props his head up with the heel of his palm and waits.

-

"I dreamt about New Hampshire."

Josh's voice jolts Sam from dozing off and he sits up quickly.

"Hey." He squeezes Josh's hand again. "How are you feeling? Any better?"

Josh coughs and Sam stands up to get him more water.

He doesn't answer until after he's drained half the cup and Sam is settled back in his seat.

"Okay." He blinks the sleep out of his eyes. "Still really tired. Sore, too."

Sam winces in sympathy. "You'll probably feel like that a while."

"Yeah."

Josh seems to stare off into space for a minute, before repeating, "I dreamt about New Hampshire. Right after it happened, I mean."

"Yeah." Sam clears his throat, suddenly back there in the hall with the team of doctors and nurses around him. "You were mumbling about needing to go to New Hampshire when they brought you in."

"I was thinking about when I was working for Hoynes. How Leo convinced me to go see the President speak in Nashua."

Josh is still staring off to the side so Sam takes his hand again to bring his attention back to him.

"I've been thinking about it, too." At Josh's confused look, he elaborates. "The day you came and visited me in New York. Right before you left for Nashua."

Sam smiles to himself. "You said New Hampshire and suddenly I was right back there on that street with you eating hotdogs."

Josh barks out a laugh. "You, Sam. You ate the hotdogs."

He grins. "Oh yeah. That's right."

Josh rolls his eyes. "Nine o'clock in the morning and this guy wanted a hotdog."

"I could go for one right now, to be honest."

Josh shakes his head and winces. "Stop making me laugh, idiot."

Before Sam loses his nerve, he blurts out, "I wish you would've kissed me that day."

Josh eyes snap up to meet his. After a moment, he clears his throat nervously. He squeezes Sam's hand. "I wanted to."

Sam's breath catches in his throat and they spend several moments just looking at each other.

"Why didn't you?"

Josh looks down at their joined hands sheepishly and Sam feels a blush creep up his own neck. "You know I'm horrible at this."

He tries to stifle the laugh that comes up his throat but fails. Josh pinches the back of his hand in retaliation. Still laughing, Sam brings his other hand up to cover Josh's and tilts his head up at him, urging him to finish. 

Josh shakes his head fondly and grips his hands back. Sam looks down at their hands, all four intertwined and his heart swoops in his chest. 

"I never know what to do when I like someone. I just end up acting like a fool. You've seen it."

Sam smirks. "It's endearing."

He watches a blush spread over Josh's cheeks.

"You also had just told me about Lisa." Josh says, his tone a bit more serious now. "I was afraid I had missed my window."

Sam startles out a laugh and Josh looks confused. "What?"

"I was thinking the same thing that day." Sam says, soflty. He can hear the wonder in his voice but he doesn't care. "When all you did was nod your head, I thought that was it. That I had missed my chance."

Josh's eyes glisten and Sam squeezes his hands. "I found myself stuck there in Manhattan but I was too scared to leave."

"But Josh." He takes a deep breath. "I would've followed you anywhere. All you had to do was ask."

He breaks eye contact and smiles down at their hands. "Then, you came back and got me."

He looks up at Josh through his lashes and whispers, "Surely, you must know how much I love you."

Josh huffs out a laugh as a tear rolls down his cheek. Sam reaches up and wipes it away. He caresses his face for a moment before Josh speaks. "I never thought it was in the same way I felt about you."

Sam shakes his head in disbelief. "How did we keep missing each other when we were both right there?"

"We're idiots." Josh says, laughing. "I don't want to miss it again. Life's too short."

Sam nods and gestures around him. "Anything could happen."

"Yeah." Josh says, his voice low and rueful. "I dreamt about Dad earlier, too. The day he died specifically and how the President came and sat with me at the airport."

Sam nods, not knowing quite what to say. "He's a good man."

After a moment of having stared off into space again, Josh looks back at Sam. "Anyway. It puts a lot of things in perspective."

"Then let's not waste any more time. Let's do this thing for real." Sam says, his voice determined. "I almost lost you and the thought of you not knowing how I feel-"

He cuts himself off and looks down shaking his head. "It doesn't matter."

"Hey." Josh says, quietly. He unclasps their hands and reaches up to touch the side of Sam's face. He cups his cheek for a long moment before running his fingers through the hair at Sam's temple. "I love you. We're gonna be alright."

Sam grabs the back of Josh's hand and squeezes it before turning his face into it. He pauses a minute and then kisses Josh's palm. "We are."

**Author's Note:**

> sam and donna comforting each other in the waiting room is canon okay i don't care what aaron sorkin says
> 
> title is from howie day's song "collide"


End file.
